I took a long gaze at the image staring at me. I couldn’t remember the last time I had sat down at a mirror. I had avoided it for the longest time but today, today I had the confidence to linger a little longer.
I pulled the veil up to my face, took one last look at myself and made my way to the shop. I was so excited. Early in the morning, I had overheard some women say that He was back in town and He would be dining at Simon’s house.
I made quick steps to the shop, tugging on tightly to my veil. It’s what I wore during the day to hide my face but somehow, someone would still recognize me.
I’d gotten used to people taking a different route whenever they saw me. I preferred those ones though. The ones who acted like I had a stinking leprous disease that would infect them if they came close.
Those ones were a bit kind. The others, well, the others had no heart. They would deliberately walk past me and spit on me as they rained down insults on me. ‘Whore, dog, slut just to name a few.
But I didn’t give a damn that day. I was a changed woman and nothing could snatch away the new found joy I possessed.
I finally got to the shop, selected the best and most expensive jar and ran to Simon’s house.
I arrived just in time. When the food was served and the guests were settled. I stopped at the door and ransacked the room with my eyes searching for Him.
And there He was. The most beautiful man reclining at the table with a bunch of grapes in his hand and an aura of peace on His head. Everyone’s attention was on him.
His face was like the sun. Unexplainably radiant, gentle yet intense, incredibly bright and at the same time incredibly calming. His golden wavy hair, as bright as his countenance, gently resting on His shoulders.
As I took a step forward, He simultaneously raised his head and looked straight into my eyes. I almost lost my balance.
Images of the last time I saw Him danced through my mind. In all the years I’d lived, His eyes were the first that didn’t look at me like I was a disgusting heap of garbage. There was no wrath, no judgement, just love. Love so deep the oceans couldn’t match. I was used to people turning the other way when they saw me but surprisingly, He walked towards me, placed His hand on my shoulder and said “You’re sins are forgiven my child. Go and sin no more”
And here He was again, looking at me with the same loving eyes. By now, the entire room was quiet. All eyes were on me. The village prostitute!
I walked up to Him, gently lowered the veil and opened the jar I was holding. Tears streaming down my face, I gently poured the perfume on his head. It’s fragrance filled the whole room.
This was my worship. This wasn’t just a jar of perfume. This was my love, my desires, my dreams, my doubts, my mistakes, my regrets, my tears and fears all poured on Him.
He closed his eyes and gently smiled as if to simmer in the sacredness of the moment.
A voice pierced through the silence, robbing away the beauty of the moment.
“Do you know how much money that cost? We could have used it to help the poor.”
It was one of his men. I think they called him Judas and He wasn’t happy with what I’d done.
I felt heat rush to my cheeks and a crippling fear that heightened the speed of my heartbeat.
“What was I thinking? Why didn’t I just wait until the people were gone and avoid this embarrassment?”
All the condemning voices in my head began to arise. As I stood there lost for words, He spoke up,
“Judas, the poor you will always have with you but not I. What she has done is a beautiful thing and she will be forever remembered because of it”
Then He looked up at me, eyes welling up with tears of love. He didn’t say a word. And he didn’t have to because I read it all in His eyes. Everything in them screamed “I love you. I love you my child. You are precious to me and I delight in your offering”
Slowly, my heart regained its rhythm and joy wrapped its warm arms around me.
It didn’t matter.
It didn’t matter what they thought or said.
They could go ahead and despise my worship.
They could go ahead and sneer at me as I danced and sang to Him.
They could go ahead and insult me.
I didn’t care.
I had done it for my king. The one who didn’t care how filthy and messed up I was. The one who gave up everything for me, even his very breath.
This king loved my worship, he thought it was beautiful. And that was all that mattered!!!!!
(PS: You will be called very many names when you choose to follow this Jesus radically, but don’t worry. He sees it, He loves it and He smiles lovingly at you.) 😉